Weight Of The World

I truly feel like I have a million bricks on my shoulders right now. I have done everything required of a dutiful daughter today, taking the mother into the bank, the photo shop, the supermarket, the chemist... yet still when she phones me I just get yelled at for trying to explain how I'm working through the pile of people who need telling the father went and dropped f*cking dead on us 2 weeks ago. I'm doing my best here, she's blind to it, she was blind to her own domestic abuse and blind to the fact her husband systematically emotionally beat down her child until there was not much left at all, just a pile of goo and bones.

I feel a bit like going into the middle of the woods and screaming.

I will get to the end of the things to do eventually though one hopes. We went and finalised the funeral service this afternoon, so that's all done. Of course I let mum have her way about which pic to have on the front of the service booklet, she can have what she wants, my pic can go on the back, does it even matter? Apparently we're getting a mock up so we can see which we like best, but it's a done deal as far as she's concerned, I'm left with no stomach for a fight over any of it any more, do what you like and charge over £4000 for it people, knock yourselves out.......

Oh and a quote from mum's mate to end.....

"Hope you are coping ok, your mum tells me she couldn't have managed without you. xx"

Huh... who knew.